Good Morning, as always, hoping you are safe and well.

Every morning I get up with my 2 and a half year old granddaughter. I am always up before her, but I wait to hear her singing; exactly what my daughter did as a child when she woke up, it is a memory I hope will never fade.

Every morning she is so happy to see me, and I her. She greets me every morning with ” Graaaaaammmmie! I love you!, Grammie, I so proud of you, I love you!” She fills my heart.

Blankie and Unicorn go everywhere with her, it’s so sweet. To bed, in the car, when she is ” laxin” ( relaxing, lol), to the bath, just waiting there until she is done, and along with her for cuddles from all of us. Even on facetime chats with her Gramma Susu in Scotland, it’s amazing. She even comforts her little sister on occasion with these treasures of hers, sharing her love.

Her smile is big and meaningful, her laughter is pure and wild. At 2 and a half, she is determined, smart and simply loves being loved. She is beautiful.

A few days ago we had a fabulous rain storm; after the storm, I took her outside to see the biggest and most colorful double rainbow. ” many colors grammie, many colors! ” Today at breakfast, she yelled out RAINBOWS, just yelled it out and smiled.

Next……

This is the sunrise through our front door.

I had to share this, it is so beautiful.

Next…..

Its day 10 or 11 with CBD, feeling good. There are still (obviously) my underlying symptoms and manifestations of my EOA, but the ongoing nagging pain has subsided to more than tolerable,  I am grateful, honestly.

I switched to a different CBD, the one I was talking about, from the stock of the plant. It doesn’t smell as good or even taste as good BUT it has 33mg of CBD per 100mg. I still do, on occasion, SNIFF the warm scents of the first CBD oil I purchased, it is very comforting.

It’s a strange feeling, this new normal. The initial ” outward” pain has certainly subsided. Alot of the ” inward” , underlying pain is waning and more tolerable; the deeper pain is less.  I measure my pain in all three of those ways. It is surprising to me to have 3 levels of describable pain.

In addition, even more surprising to me, my outward body , just under my skin, feels different in places to the touch. Small things, like my collarbone, my upper chest, my wrists, ankles and even shins; really anywhere where the bone is closer to the skin somehow feels less ” puffy?”. Its odd. More on that later, although I do have a theory.

Additionally, I’ve noticed a positive switch in my posture. Pain can do so many things to your body. A pose into a “fetal” type position, even while standing, can happen with body pain, it certainly did with me. Intense moments still saw me clenching my hands into fists, that has eased off to lesser moments, often not happening for days. The images in my mind float off to those in non-verbal or later stage Alzheimer’s, that subject is for another day.

As an additional measure, I flushed my system.

I have never been one to take medicine’s, 2 Tylenol would put me to sleep. I consider ALL medicine I am taking to be somewhat toxic to my body…..even though some are ” medically proven” to assist me, while others, the natural ones probably build up too. Build up leads to improper absorption, therefore, limiting effectiveness.

“Too much of a good thing” kind of thinking, perhaps warped, in a sense, or not, but honesty, I have experienced medication overload.  My intestines, organs and bowel system just cant handle it…..so i cleaned them all out.

In my head, the residue of unfiltered muck stays in there, like a backed up drain; cleaning the drains, in my view, is important.  I do this on a regular basis for my own personal system,  it works for me.

I know when my own body has had enough. Changes in many functions start to occur, as well as outward physical signs.  These days I’m a little more “slower” recognizing the signals my body is giving, but I can still pat myself on the back for getting there.

I do NOT use harsh chemicals, crazy home remedies or “fads” to heal and flush myself from medical toxicity, I wouldn’t want to harm myself further. It is a practice I use as I feel it helps. For me, it does. My family can even see the difference.

Moving forward, I’m gonna stick with CBD.  I think moving to “plant stock” variety has been a great choice for me. Next step up, if needed, will be THC based.. ..anything to get off ( or lower) the amount & type of pharmaceuticals prescribed to me for pain.

Last year, early in the year, I sent a short video to my daughter of my right hand, I wanted it for my neurologist to see as well. Symptoms or events can often come and go with this illness, sometimes they come back, sometimes they don’t. Trying to explain the things that happen, explain the ever-changing kaleidoscope and then having no proof of it actually happening is an issue; things can be so random, often manifesting in one time events and be truly significant, I learned early that PROOF is important.

In the video, there was a very apparent tremor in my right middle finger, I knew it was significant. During the past year, I’ve noticed a few changes in that tremor and growing resistance in my right arm; I also believe this is associated with the pain in my right hip, the pain and stiffness are likened to each other, it is all right sided. In my head, I believe it is blood flow; I believe there is an issue, a growing issue. I will speak to both my GP and my Internist about this issue, I will have them, if concerned contact my Neurologist. It is unfortunate that my Neurologist is located in the epicenter city in my region during COVID19 times; honestly, I’d like to see her, so many things are changing with me and I’d like a bit of input.

Anyway, extension of my right arm is labored; enough for me to notice; my middle right finger has a constant tremor. I let my daughter know this morning. Worrisome as it is a growing deficit, magnifying. As always, more on that later.

Stay healthy, happy and safe my friends xo Jan xo

and now….. Andy Williams, ” I can sing a rainbow”: Enjoy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bND0DSUiHNk