I am totally diggin’ the “hush” that is happening in the background of life.

I was chatting with ma’ pal Chrissy, and she mentioned how well her brain seemed to be working and I yelled out, MINE TOO!

Now, just to be clear, when you have Dementia, you question it, you think, “is this one of the moments that are better before it gets worse????”, those are real life things, worries both shared by those diagnosed and their care partners.

After we finished our loud elation’s of ” No Way! you too” and “OMG!!!! I thought I was imagining it! WOW!”, and out loud belly laughs, I think we BOTH realized that this is a real thing, even for us with Dementia.

Its been a reported fact that this is indeed real, I just didn’t know how real.

From Brussels, to Mexico, To California and to Canada. The effects of people adhering to “social distancing” and “lock down measures” and all that entails , has had an enormous effect on our environment, our seismic activity all over the world, our sleeping patterns and the good sleep we are getting, as well the animals, our plant life and of course decreased air pollution. But what I have also found, that beyond all of that, my dementia mind is calm.

Having Dementia means a whole lot of things are happening at once, all the time it is often associated with Adult Attention Deficit Disorder, AADD. Keeping a calm mind is often quite difficult, there is so much we have to think about. And on top of it all, death……

None of us want to die, but we, those diagnosed with Dementia, have been given a timeline of sorts. We were aptly provided with “probable lifespan”. in other words, from diagnosis to death. Its always there.

If you have a deadline at work, or a deadline to hand in your paper to a teacher, you do all you can to meet that deadline. I hope you see what I’m saying.

Beyond the thoughts of trying to get “all the things done”, there is spending time with those you love, trying to struggle through everyday activities, making decisions, wondering “when the hell did I loose my ability to write with a pen?”, ” remember appointments, make appointments and get to them, intermittent sleep, pain and phantom pain, questions, input, finding things in the fridge that go in bathroom, washing your face, taking a shower, learning new skills, Doctors, Lawyers, patience, impatience, the dog, cooking, eating, forgetting, blurred vision, hallucinations, speech loss or impairment, wondering and more wondering, repeat words, repeating phrases, confusion, remaining aware, daydreaming, hyper-focused-ness, could care-less-ness, nightmares, day-mares, burning food, stopping cooking and driving, loosing lifelong abilities, loosing life long privileges…………..arrrgh… striving to live well, it can be difficult, even for a healthy mind….. I believe that the quiet of the Earth is helping.

Seeing so much of what we go through, written down, is harder. It hurts to write it. But the things we go through are immense. Living a life where no matter what the odds are, your try to survive, gracefully. You do your best to live well.

The current CALM of our little blue planet is in my view, a blessing. For me it has allowed much needed uninterrupted sleep more days in a row than the last 5 years.

Do you feel any different? Do you have a clearer mind? I invite you to send me a message regarding this. I would honestly appreciate hearing from you.

I know that there is so much going on, jobs are lost, our human connection as we know it has changed, so many things will change moving forward, but that is not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about you, your state of calm.

Most people I know, seem to have an “inner knowledge” of “this is just how it is, it will be this way for a while, but things will get better.” Hope remains heavy and real. I think the calm has reached them. I am hopeful that those who are having a hard time dealing with all the stuff going on, begin to feel better, start to sleep better and feel better.

For me, I needed this. I needed the calm vibrations instead of the bumpy ones. I am enjoying the quiet and the good sleep I am getting. I am productive and have a bit more clarity, something that has eluded me for years.

I am torn by what is happening in this wonderful world of ours, and for the region I live in. I worry for my Mum, we are separated by an entire ocean. I worry for both of my daughters, my -son-in-law, and all my grandchildren, I worry for all of my friends, hoping they are all staying safe. I can say now, though, I am not overwhelmed, I am very grateful.

I hope that you are staying safe and well, I hope that the CALM that has come from the slow of the earthly vibration, a vibration that may very well have hammered us for years, I hope the CALM reaches you.

Next………………

I am trying to remember a “jingle” , well, a little song we used to sing as kids in the schoolyard. I have bits and pieces, but I can’t quite remember the whole thing.

It has little pieces like this….”Beech-nut chewing gum, chew it all the time, Beech-nut chewing gum, it only cost a dime, dime dime.”

I want to remember it. Can ya’ give a girl a hand? Thanks

Next………..

I’ve been packing, still…. well, all my boxes are done, I just need to wrap 4 bigger items (dressers), take apart my bed and decide what to do with the straggly stuff that sits randomly around. I think I’ve done quite well, but I guess the truth will rear its ugly head once my daughter helps me unpack, I’m sure there will be surprises. Hahahahaha!

Clothing is a hard thing to part with for me. I have a style of comfort and ease, but some things the more dressy stuff I’ll probably never wear again, like the stuff I wore to work. For some strange reason its hard to part with.

I’ve managed to rid my closet of most things, but there are still those that I know I’ll have no use for, still not finding the courage to bin them.

Perhaps its the part of me that just can’t let go of the “what if”.

I think I, maybe all, of us the earlier stages of Dementia, still have hope that this whole thing will just go away, like it was a mistake and the Doctors & tests are all wrong. Its a secret wish I have all tucked away inside that often pop’s out on the days I feel so much like my old self.

I know that its not true, but still, it keeps me from releasing the small things, like my clothes. Its odd. Those fleeting moments of hope can bring you up or down; right now I know its just the memories the items hold. Funny.

I hope your weekend is full of happiness!

Here is another great blast from the past! Get your groove on! https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=otCpCn0l4Wo&list=RDAMVMotCpCn0l4Wo

Stay well my friends xo Jan xo